Sunday, June 6, 2010

it's already done

i've felt there's been a lack of rest in my life lately. i'm just restless. like it's not like i'm not sleeping 8 hours/night or resting on the weekends ... biking and taking long walks, listening to sermons and having fun ... but there's still something that's missing. like soul rest or something. it goes deeper than just not going to work.

unfortunately i'm the kind of person who ...
walks out of work and never got enough done... maybe i should stay late or come early
thinks i can do a ton of stuff and i must do a ton of stuff to grow
gets nervous that in the future i just might fall off the edge and stop growing
is never satisfied, always on a mission, and never does enough

in the past day or two it's really sinking in that ya there's a lot of change to be made in my life, but all that needs to be done to make those changes happen is already done. i can't do anything to make God love me more ... or less than he already does. to grow more or less. IT IS FINISHED. Jesus died on the cross and now i have his righteousness and not my own. he saved me and he will sanctify me in the same way... by grace. Jesus plus nothing. fruit is gradual, inevitable, organic for those who have the spirit. he is in control and not me. he wants my good more than i do ... and he has the power to do it.

cease striving!

the greatest thing is knowing and believing and living in the truth that i have nothing to prove. freedom! joy! rest. soul rest. (and how great is it that he is going to grow me in this area! cuz that's just how great our God it)